Am I converting – My Jihaad

I finished my “chalia” means 40 days visit to the temple during morning and evening “Aarti” for Durga Maa. This was suggested by one of our Jyotishi. That was to avoid any hurdle from my relationship with Nadeem. The very 40th day I had a flight from Delhi to Dubai. With this background I came here and entered in a community that was almost Alien to me. Jamia days gave me lil insight into the rituals from a distance. My relationship with Nadeem was never conditionalJ At least from his side. I had loads of conditions though to name few of them are “NO MEAT” in my house or a Kitchen. No CIRCUMCISION for my son. To be very true I did it for the sake of religion for Arman. Though I believe that we are an ultimate creation of Allah and Allah cannot create that is not perfect. I do not regret but I did not believe but I did it one thing in life for the sake of “what people will say if my son is not”4

It was when I lost my brother & my uncle; suddenly I was shattered and wanted some peace of mind. I started reading Quran to know exactly what is in there. I quite like what I was reading. I used to share with Nadeem my chapters during our evening walks.

That reading made me feel guilty for not reading GEETA. So I started reading both the books together. I had read Bhagwat Geeta b4 but the reading at this age was more significant and meaningful. Nadeem used to fast during Ramadan and I used to do Hindu types fasting with him (with liquid and fruitsJ) that was too on and off. I have read Quran 2&1/2 times with an English translation.

I celebrate Diwali and seek HIS blessings to enlighten our lives with happiness the way HE has for messenger Rama. I seek victory for us the way HE made messenger Rama victorious.
I celebrate Rakshabandhan to seek HIS blessings to keep and cherish the love & belongingness between my kids as a brother and sister for ever & ever, with me or without me. I fast on Karwachoth to wish HIS blessings for my relationship with Nadeem. I play holi & prey to Al Mighty Allah/God/Ishwar to keep the colors of happiness in our lives as long as we live and thereafter. I believe in Messenger Krishna (MPBUM) & Janamashthmi as much as I believe in Profit Mohd’s (MPBUM) & we mark his birthday in Dubai too. I believe in Navratras to seek HIS blessings for empowering women to stand against all the odds and provide strength to our families through our thick and thin.

While we were on Umrah, we had visiting various historical places of religious significance. I still do want to visit place where Shree Rama & Krishna were born. Though I have been there before, I have “Performed Charon Dhaam Terath Yatra” but my understanding about their existence was different at that point of time.

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